Hi ya,
Coming back to the blog world after a long time. Was in Bangalore 1st week of this month for the heavenly Yes++ with Guruji. Man, the combinations were just electifying. Guruji, Vishalakshi Mandap, Ashram, Bawa, Food, Full Moon, Meditations...
Since I did my 1st Yes!+ I would see people burst into tears just at a glimpse of guruji or when being near guruji. I never really understood this phenomena. There I would be standing with feeling nothing when guruji arrives and people around me are feeling all kinds of emotions known to man kind & I'll be thinking - huh?! Untill now. For the first time, after a year of being actively involved in Art of Living I cried at the glimpse of guruji! It was on the day when we were coming out of silence. We were doing one of the simplest yet torturest (I'm sure there is no such word, still it's deceptively painful) meditation, this could easily have been used in concentration camps to keep the few rebels in there skins. 20 minutes of pain, and when we opened the eyes, lo and behold Guruji was sitting as gracious as ever, smiling in front of 400 of us blessed souls!!! We went delirious with joy!
I went numb...& within few minutes I was in tears, of gratitude, of peace, of strength, of happiness, of hope. It was just so beautiful!...tears just kept trickling down my cheeks. But the heart was light as a feather. Entire being tingling with the sight of him. It's a sight that can only be experienced.
People would throng, push, pull, kill (with a smile!), jump, do everything that'll convince a monkey that these people surely must have been in his family sometime; to get near guruji, to touch him once, to be blessed by him, to talk to him. It was so amusing, yet I understand the joy people are experiencing & the gratitude they just can't express fully. I, for one, feel so comfortable just to see him, I don't tumble others to get near him - coz I know he is close to me , or shout my lungs out to talk to him - coz I don't need words to talk to him, to touch him - coz he is a part of me & I am a part of him & to get blessings from him - Coz I know I am blessed.
I wonder & pity those people who have not experienced anything like this in their life time, who are caught up with things that don't matter, with routine 9-5 stuff, yet I am greatful that I've felt it. I feel for people who just reel in there minds, intellectualising his effect on the world not knowing that he transcends mind & intellect, that this knowlege can only be experienced not debated or understood through words or concepts of the head.
Although, just like Rishikesh Yes++ I would sleep off in between the meditations ever so often. Bhaiya did gave an answer to this, that whatever my body needs, will be given to it.
The games, all the activities, meditations, knowledge all seeped deep in. I was so free and myself during this course. During silence I felt completely detached & disconnected from everyone around me, which was little difficult at first coz I've started to feel everyone as a part of me, as a part of god. I had 103 fever last day of the course, still I was there in VM at night for Bawa's session - with a blanket. Commitment before feelings put into practice.
One thing that I still can remember vividly is the sense that I can do anything. Things which used to hold me back from being my true self, from being complete no longer are there. I have the power within me to change the world, one step at a time.
Missed her at times at night. One more beautiful event was the moonlit nights every night of the course, with guruji guiding us through the meditation in the amphitheatre in front of VM & answering questions. We stayed in the new rooms in 'Aparna'. It was awesome! I could see the moon from the window in my room, snuggled up in my bed. Thought about her. No questions, no answers, no events, no voices, no fights, no past, no future - just her spirit. It was nice.
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I was reading something about guruji and discovered the reason why tears well up in people's eyes, when they see Guruji is - Devotion - the highest form of love. And perfect example of that is Kavi di.
