Of Marriage & Relatives... Posted by In Search Of Myself , Wednesday, July 18, 2007 at 3:45 AM, in

Came back from my home town. I went there after almost 3 years! Nothing much has changed there though. Few of my friends have gotten married (one even had a new born baby boy; talk about jet age) & that has given my parents & relatives alike, extra ammunition in convincing me to get married.

Will come to that later. I also went to my nani's town, that too after 10 years!! Man, time sure flies! I met all my mausi's & mama's (mom's sis & bro's). Since that time, the government's red triangle idea of 'hum do hamaare do' was not conceived, my mom has sister's and brother's - yep plural, both. Add to that in a small town almost every body who ever said hi to you more than thrice, will surely become a distant relative, so I have an extra spare set of mausi's & mama's too. In fact nani & nana's too. :)

The kids who were kids before, have grown up all tall & in10 years new generation of kids have materialized. So, no wonder I didn't know 90% of the tiny tots, who were jumping all over me, crooning latest Himesh Reshamiya's songs in my ears with scaringly accurate nasal twangs, laughing in mysterious giggles, like one does if someone's fly is open.

One thing for sure, kids in small towns have still retained their innocence as compared to kids in urbanised India, where kids watch, listen & experience everything a little too soon for their young minds.

Then my mamaji explained to me very patiently & logically (I have to admit he was right though) that how postponing marriage delays lots of other things in life - Kids, their education, wedding etc.

If my mom is to be believed, some people have already referred new, unsuspecting female candidates for the profile of my wife & since I haven’t shown the green flag, she had to reject their offers.

First thing, I know how important is wedding in one's life. I don't know if I am ready for such a giant leap. May be I am, may be I am not. As per my sis if I am not ready, I'll be, after I get married-as others do. But I am not sure if I can inflict myself upon a poor soul (though girl's nowadays are anything BUT poor or innocent). Now, I am fairly nice guy, heck this is my blog-I am extremely nice guy (on 2nd thoughts, I read in some e-mail on pataoing girls few years back, that current trend is girls like bad boys...hmm what do you know, I might not be such a nice guy after all).

Even so, I don't have few much desired traits that a wife looks for in her darling dearest. Like, she would want to spend double the amount that I may earn. I am ok with that as long as she spends it all on me, but I think a fuse will short-circuit somewhere if, she wants to buy shoes #14 or suit # 103 or jewellery worth the GDP of Australia.

Then, I'm not patient enough to listen to all things she had to go through the whole day, how she got Tomatoes for 12 Rs. instead of 14Rs., how she won an argument with my mom or vice-versa, how she could have married anyone else other than me, how she would want this or that, how many problems she has at work. All that is ok to, if there's a point to it. Coz as soon as I’m gonna attempt to give her a solution, I'd be labeled as insensitive coz I don't listen. All she wants is someone to listen, while she vents for 45 mins & here I am, with my twisted nose, with the audacity to try to hand her a solution to her miseries. How can I?

Or on a weekend I might just want to watch TV or go to a movie or simply zzzzz…but she might want me to visit her friend no. 1546576 or to clean the house.

Anyway, fairly recently my life has got some direction. I finally have a sense of purpose and vision. Something that says that I am important too, something that tells me that I can make a difference too. Something that excites me, despite all odds. Something that inspires me to reach out, break my patterns, become more than what I am. And that thing is public service. More on this later.

So, I am not sure when or if I’ll get married. For all I know I might remain celibate as Dinesh bhaiya and serve or I may run away tomorrow & get married with the first girl who accepts my proposal. So if you are a good looking, traditionally modern (?) girl reading this blog, get in touch. So that I can propose, you can accept and we may run away.

I promise I’ll earn double than you can spend, I’d listen to your endless bitter tirades ranging from the child of a mosquito to the party habits of princess of Zambia-without interrupting & I’ll pretty much do anything on a weekend to keep you from running away. But Of course promises are meant to be broken. :0)